Yesterday one of my buddies/neighbors Ian (aka. Lil’ Bitch) called me and asked if he could barrow “a Pot and Guitar Hero…” … I’ll guarantee that of the 1000’s of phone calls world wide a day that involve ‘Pot and Guitar Hero’ — This is the first one ever to actually mean ‘Pot’ in the form of that of which you cook food in…

I guess either way he’s still baking something…

I for one welcome our new alien overlords… But apparently, this alien spider wants to keep us out of space… What are they hiding from us!!!

Story and Video Here.

*Update* Apparently, it wasn’t a giant alien spider, but in fact just a spider crawling on one of NASA’s live feed camera. I’m a little disappointed… But I guess I can cancel my order for a giant shoe.

I recently read something that said that Florida had not only the rudest drivers, but then saw a news report that said ‘Floridians’ complain that the people here are the rudest in America. I finally experienced that first hand this weekend…

The Story:
( Feel free to jump to the conclusion if you don’t care about the story… )

What sparked me writing this is… “The Jaime” and I started our Holiday shopping yesterday. We are both extremely polite people (Which is hard, considering I hate everything). And we don’t ask that people are the same — We realize that not everyone is brought up the same way. But, all we ask for in return are the basic Please, Thank you, Sorry, Wave, and respect others personal space. Yesterday both “The Jaime” and I were treated so horribly by people that by the end of the day even we were about to stab each other in the eye. People pushing… Slamming doors in our faces… Blocking isles with strollers/carts left horizontally… (Which were not moved with an ‘Oh! I’m sorry…’ But with eye rolls and sighs…)

At this point, we had decided to just call it a day… When “The Jaime” suggested we swing by Target, and pick up our Toys for Tots gifts. Every year we both donate toys to any business that supports Toys for Tots that we frequent… And we also decided this year, that what ever we’re spending on Toys for Tots, we will also spend the same on animals at the local animal shelter. (Which we are both big supporters of and thought was a great idea since neither of us have time to volunteer) We figured if we get this out of the way now, we had a chance of salvaging the day — and not killing each other. Which almost happened. Target had some great sales going on and we ended up with almost twice the amount of toys we usually get. In fact, we almost filled a cart despite a minor argument over whether or not a Sock Monkey would scare kids… (Personally I think they are pretty rad… And are more than a toy, but a symbol of ingenuity) — So we were in much better moods by this point.

So, once we were done checking out at Target, as we were heading out… This little kid running around ran right in front of our cart and I literally missed him by millimeters… If I had even the slightest bit of distraction I would of clobbered the kid. So, there I stood, standing on my tippy toes, clutching the cart to my waist on the largest inhale I have taken in years, watching the mother watch everything that was happening… And nothing.. No ‘I’m sorry’, No discipline, no acknowledgement from the parents standing 5 feet away… Not only did she not care to apologize, she clearly didn’t care about the safety of her kid, who kept on running… At this point - I broke character — and all I could do was shake my Head… I had finally lost all faith in my community and the people that live in it… This action triggered a blow up from the kids mother ” HOW DARE YOU SHAKE YOUR HEAD!! HE’S JUST A LITTLE KID!!!!” — (Now looking at her husband) — “YOU SEE THAT! HOW F—ING RUDE!!!” …

Perhaps it was a little rude, but because of the ignorance of this woman she couldn’t understand that I was shaking my head at her, not the kid… Kids will be kids.. I understand that — but it’s the responsibility of the parents to make right on these situations. In her mind, she had put me in a Loose/Loose situation. Had I of hit the kid she clearly would of gone off on me.. And apparently, since I didn’t hit the kid — It was also my fault and his actions were acceptable from her lack of response from the situation — of course until my catalyst where she put the blame on me and the kid — not her or her husband.

So, the day had now officially gone to shit. Jaime (she too was pretty upset so she was no longer ‘The Jaime’ at this point) just said — “Lets head to Publix and I’ll get our grocery shopping done… And you can head over to the bar, grab a beer, and watch some football…” (There is a bar next to our community Publix) Upon entering, where someone held the door open for me, no less than 5-6 people said ‘Hi’ to me (Just face acquaintances, not really first name basis type people).. The ‘regulars’ at the bar started busting my chops about the Steeler Game.. And I ran into some really close friends and sat down for some chit-chat.. I was finally being reminded that there are awesome people in my community…

That’s when I noticed out of the corner of my eye a couple complaining that the only seats left weren’t booths, that the football crowd watching the Giants/Bears game was too loud (Yet they were in a sports bar at 5:00 on a Sunday), and finally how long they needed to wait when they came in for someone to help them (Despite the sign that clearly says ‘Please seat yourself’) — The waitress came up and he ordered a Gin & Tonic — And was told they only have Beer & Wine… They then proceeded to get up and leave and the guy mumbled “Can’t even get a drink in this f’n town…” …

When it finally all made sense to me:

The Conclusion:

True Floridians have learned to be very patient people. All of us have lived through community growing pains, state wide ridicule and embarrassment, and even worse many-many natural disasters.

I love being a Floridian, and other Floridians are some of the nicest people you’ll ever meet. The majority of us are immigrants from all over the country, and all over the world. And once we get over the pride of who we were, and accept the fact of who we now are — We realize that for every 2 bad neighbors we have, we have at least 1 great neighbor. We all came here to survive based off of promises and dreams of a tropical gold rush. And those of us that have learned that we need to help and be polite to each other because our current community (and not the one you came from) is what supports our standard of living and contains the people that we see and depend on every day — are the ones that make Florida such a great place to live — And benefit greatly from living here.

The rest of the people are not yet ‘Floridians’… They don’t care about the community, or the people in it. They don’t see the need to be polite, nice, curtius, or even happy for that matter, because they don’t consider Florida their “Home” yet, and don’t give a shit about the people who do. Florida is literally just some transient microcosm they are stuck in until something better comes along. And you can tell these people by when you ask them “Where are you from?” — Floridians will respond with ‘Here’ or ‘Originally…‘ — Non Floridians simply — ‘‘…

So, what can we do? Treat everyone with the same respect no matter what… Florida is on the top 10 growing states every year, so it’s just going to get worse… I learned this weekend, it’s not worth stooping to their level and from now on I’m just going to tolerate and kill them with kindness… Because if they don’t realize the value of their community and how awesome the people are all by themselves, they’re going to be the miserable ones with high blood pressure… Not me…